Somewhere down the line, I feel that I pushed her too hard... Mebbe she realizes it now... Mebbe down in the cockles of her heart, she still IS waiting for him. Is she?
I donno, and I feel scared. Really scared. I can give her commitment, I can give her the love that I can. Mebbe it would not measure up to the amount of love that she needs.
A said today that my level of commitment has not been seen by her before me. That is why she is scared. Maybe. But on the other hand, does this mean that V never scared her? Did she believe every word of that to be true? What do I do wrong that V did to make her believe?
I have always maintained that the good guys end up getting the raw deal. ALWAYS.
I cried today. I feel like cutting my wrists wide open and see the blood run in spurts until the white marble floor has intricate fascinating designs on them.
I need to make love. Seriously... I do...
Love, laughter n keep the Faith